My daughter was born premature 7 years ago and I've held onto a lot of grief and trauma around it - from having her taken away from me unnecessarily and then not seeing her for many hours. This has resulted in her being very clingy with me, somewhat insecure to make friends and not even wanting to leave me to go into other rooms without me up until very recently. From when she was a small baby I struggled with so many things caring for her because I was in a state of shock and trauma. I was very isolated and felt very isolated as a mother and so much of this was because we missed out on that crucial bonding time after birth. Luckily I took up a meditation practice a few years ago and that has made a lot of difference to my motherhood anxiety as well as various healing work and grief work but there was still trauma.
It occurred to me a few days ago that the Rebirthing Ceremony that is part of Sama's Apprenticeship could be used to reimprint our ideal scenario of her birth. I suggested it to her (she knows about the difficulties we had at the time as we have spoken about it) and she was really excited - 'Let's do it now' she said. Oh ok so maybe it doesn't need to be planned out as a ceremony and we did an impromptu play rebirthing..and it was wonderful. We got a blanket, put it over her and she curled up 'in my tummy'. I talked to her and connected with her, like when she was in my womb, encouraged her to turn (as she had originally been breach and turned) and then she birthed herself head first out of the bottom of the blanket. A nice red womby blanket. Then I cuddled her and delighted and awed over her. We had a big bear as Daddy 'look how beautiful she is, Daddy - she's perfect!' and we snuggled and did pretend booby feeding and lots more cherishing. We had an old sock that had a long string we used for the placenta and did the delayed cord clamping, and cord cutting and some more snuggling and feeding then after all that oxytocin (I could actually feel my womb was ready!) I naturally birthed the sock placenta and kept it to make medicine from. This was such a deeply healing and of course empowering experience and we both loved it. It was absolutely beautiful. Thankyou so much Sama <3 <3 <3 Naomy Raven, Sound and Holistic Voice Therapist, Musician and Teacher www.sacredvoicehealingdrum.co.uk